January 8, 2007

I'm not in a good mood.

Since I have nothing to do for my classes (yet), I was organizing my external hard drive. Dorky, I know, but I can't find any of my music so it has to be done. I came upon a few files that were left over/lost when I fixed her computer a year ago. I opened what I thought was a website file (bad idea) and found a conversation between her and a guy that she really liked. I didn't read it; I didn't want to, nor did I feel comfortable reading it. But I still felt a wave of feelings, most of them bad. It's not that I still fret about that stuff, but I remember how much I didn't like hearing about it at the time.

Sometimes I wish feelings could just go away. I mean, Linsey and I were great and I was very very much in love with her. But now I'm not, and I'm okay with that. But every once in a while I get reminded of what I had. Actually it's more like I'm reminded of what I still don't have. Still, I'm happy. But I don't like the reminders of better days, not that today is bad though.

Alright, I'm done rambling and unintentionally contradicting myself.

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